Why Impostor Syndrome Exists (And How To Beat It With The Validation Approach)
There is a positive reason people have impostor syndrome and three tested solutions.
There is a positive reason some people have impostor syndrome and three real solutions.
Although impostor syndrome exists for a positive reason, it still stops or slows down many people with something to share. Why does it exist? And more importantly, how do we overcome it? I offer you three tested strategies.
In 1975 Keith Jarrett sat down to play the piano in front of 1,400 people. But there was one major problem — the piano. Some of the keys didn’t work. The pedals stuck. And it was even out of tune. The organizers told him about the situation in a panic, just hours before the concert.
There wasn’t enough time to get another piano. None of the issues could be fixed before the show. And it was too late to cancel. Despite all this, he decided to play.
But how? He was a jazz performer and so he improvised. He avoided the bad keys. He didn’t use the broken pedals. He pressed the keys in an unusual order to account for the piano being out-of-tune. And the result? The audience loved it. In fact, the recording of that concert has sold over 3.5 million copies, the best selling solo piano performance of all time.
It would have been easy for Jarrett to walk away and say “The piano is broken. There is nothing I can do here.” But he didn’t. He faced this barrier and overcame it. We all face obstacles that are just as significant to us when offering our expertise in any form whether that’s writing a book, creating a course or leading a seminar. One of the biggest is the “I don’t know enough” barrier, a symptom of impostor syndrome. And like Jarrett, we too, can overcome this challenge and produce something beautiful.
But what exactly is impostor syndrome?
It is the sense that we don’t know enough or haven’t achieved enough to do what we want to do. We may feel like a fraud despite evidence to the contrary. Or it can even feel objective if we know that we’re not as accomplished as others and we interpret that to mean that we shouldn’t play in the same field as the “experts.”
This is a bit like a little league player feeling incompetent compared to a high school baseball player though. Or someone playing in the minor leagues saying they shouldn’t play on the same field as someone in the majors. The comparisons rarely make sense to an outsider, but when we’re in the throes of impostor syndrome, these thoughts can feel so real and relevant.
When we let impostor syndrome run wild, it can stop us cold
We may end up in a holding pattern, dreaming about the next step but never allowing the plane to actually land in a new destination. We never know what we could have done if we continued to take steps. And the people we could have benefited often miss out as well.
Where does impostor syndrome come from?
Oddly, it comes about as a result of a very positive characteristic — the desire to be honest and authentic. If you didn’t care if you presented a false front to people, you wouldn’t worry about being an impostor, would you? You want to be seen for who you are, so you want to come across in a way that is accurate.
And this realization is one key to overcoming this fear of being an impostor
Realizing that a true impostor wouldn’t worry at all about being an impostor. They would just put on whatever facade is necessary to reach their goals. They would quite literally take a person’s money and run. They wouldn’t stick around to ensure results for their customers and clients.
But you would.
You want others to gain benefits from your effort. Of course, you want to be paid, but you want to be paid for honest work. For some people, this realization is enough to help them move forward. If that’s you, you can stop reading and take another step. The next part is for those who need a little more help. For them, small actions are required which gather evidence that others value their expertise.
There are at least three ways to gather this kind of evidence
1. Answer questions of those in need of answers
2. Teach for free (at first)
3. Offer a thin slice of value
1. Answer questions of those in need of answers
To do this you can make a post on Facebook or other social media asking anyone what questions they have in your area. I did this recently while doing research for a program I’m authoring on how to create courses. I wasn’t sure I was ready to offer the course yet.
However, as people posted question after question, problem after problem, I could see that I knew exactly how to help them. I had answers to so many of their concerns and I was able to give advice that was greatly appreciated. This helped me see that I was ready.
2. Teach for free … at first
I know that doing something for free often gets a bad rap. However, if done strategically, I think doing something pro bono can be quite useful. The strategy here is to test your approach to see if it is ready for sale.
When I wrote a book on the SAT Essay (an essay in a college entrance exam in the US), I did a few free webinars to market the book. Some parents told me how much just the webinars improved their child’s confidence and even reduced their anxiety about the test. As a result, I knew that I had something very useful to offer.
3. Offer a thin slice of value
I have a mentor who was a cartoonist and decided to become a marketing consultant. But when he first changed fields, he wasn’t sure how he could gain credibility. Why should someone hire a cartoonist to help market their business?
Eventually, he discovered that he could help businesses come up with great taglines. He felt confident that he could do this after doing it for free for a few businesses. So that’s how he started. He then grew his services from there.
The key is to get feedback from others to get a gauge on how much value you can deliver. What you may often discover is that your knowledge and experience are useful to people who really need it.
Feedback from those in need is the evidence that will allow your brain to accept that you do know enough to teach someone, even if it’s just beginners. But isn’t that where everyone starts? We were all beginners once. We start out teaching beginners. Later we teach not-so beginners and on and on. We grow as a teacher just like your future students will grow.
But what if I discover that there are holes in my knowledge?
The best experts know enough to know that they don’t know it all. If you do discover that there is something you don’t know, you can acknowledge it as a true expert does. You can also decide if you need to fill that hole or not.
I teach courses on a particular coaching model. Once a week we have a live Q&A. I can answer most of the questions easily but every once in a while I get one where I have to say I just don’t know. How do the students react? Are they shocked? Surprised? Upset? Hardly. They don’t expect me to know everything and they appreciate that I’m able to admit that.
One mistake people make in dealing with impostor syndrome is to try to just think it through
It’s OK to do a little of that. But eventually, you need to do a small test to see how much you can help. Thinking alone rarely solves this kind of problem. That’s when action comes to the rescue.
Summary
The impostor syndrome is the sense that we don’t have enough of something to show up as an expert.
As a result, we often hold back and deprive others of our gifts.
This syndrome exists because we want to be honest about who we are and we don’t genuinely feel like an expert.
One useful insight is recognizing that only honest people worry about being an impostor, so you can’t be a true impostor.
One solution is to do experiments to test whether you do have something to offer that can benefit others.
Three tests are: Answer questions to those in need of answers, teach for free (at first) and offer a thin slice of value.
During these tests, you may discover you have more value to offer than you thought. You may also discover holes in your knowledge that you can fill.
The only mistake is to think that you can just think away impostor syndrome, it often takes small actions that help you discover more about how much you can contribute to others.
Before 1975, I’m sure if you asked Keith Jarrett if he could play professionally on a broken, out-of-tune piano, he might have laughed.
He didn’t know he could do that until he actually did it. We are the same. We really don’t know what we can do until we do it. That doesn’t mean we need to wait until we feel absolutely certain before we offer to help or teach others.
We can start with small actions that help us discover how much we can contribute. That way we satisfy that need to present ourselves honestly while also moving forward on our goals.
So take small actions to move you forward a bit. Don’t wait until you feel ready. Take action today. Find out how much people value your expertise. The world is waiting to experience your gifts.